If any of you got that worm virus last week that fucked up everyones computer, revenge may be here! One of the main kids spreading it was a fat kid named Jeffery Lee Parson. You can read an article about him on yahoo
here.
The article says about how the kid is now in custody and everything. Fine. They also say that he ran a website called t33kid.com. If you go to network solutions and search on who owns the domain, you get his home address. So let's all be nice and send this asshole uber-nerd a nice postcard.
Domain: t33kid.com
Registrant (JP397-IYD-REG)
Jeff Parson
root@t33kid.com
603 8th Ave S.
Hopkins, Minnesota 55343 US
I've been thinking about infomercials all day. Especially for cleaning products. I keep thinking about an infomercial for a cleaning product, like that DiDi 7 or the OxyClean that the bearded fat guy always tries to sell. I want to make a movie about a new cleaning product and all the trouble it causes.
My product would do all of the things that the regular cleaning products do. The infomercial would show it cleaning drapes, toilets, and all that shit. But my product would ESPECIALLY have the power to cure AIDS. If you rub it on your genitals, it cures H.I.V. is about 2-4 weeks. Buit we would not advertise this on the box, or mention it directly in the infomercial.
When it comes to the testemonial section of the commercial, we would have standard footage of people saying how wonderful and exciting the product is, and then flashing a big, bright smile. And then the last guy would be a very animated black guy who would be screaming "THIS PRODUCT CURED MY AIDS - I AM NOT LYING!" He would carry on for a few minutes, crying, praising Jesus, waving his hands in the air (like he just didn't care), and almost passing out at the extreme joy this product gave him.
Offscreen you would hear a producer say "talk about how it cleans, Chris. Tell the people about how the product cleans grout with minimal scrubbing".
Chris would look confused, and say "yes, well, this product helped clean the grout between my kitchen tiles, but, I mean, IT CURED MY AIDS! I was DYING, and now I am back up to a healthy weight, and my Doctor is stunned!!! Oh praise Jesus!!"
Then we'd cut to a wide shot of the producer (Sean) and Chris yelling. Chris, hoping the world will find out about this life saving product, and the producer, wanting Chris to follow the script provided and talk about stain removal. "You've GOT to tell the WORLD about this Sean! - the world needs to know!!!" Sean would push Chris away and say "this is MY fucking commercial - MY fucking project - you do NOT tell me how to run MY show". Eventually the two would be fighting their way backstage, where Chris would trip on a rug and split his head open. While the cast and crew frantically dialed 9-11, Sean would scratch his head, and then after a lightbulb sound effect noise was made, he would pour some of the cleaning product on Chris' head, and Chris would wake up and he would be fine. For no reason, he would also know how to speak Chinese.
